Running across the lawn with the HUGE tree trimmers, laughing loudly entering the new tree fortress... and then suddenly stricken with fear... what happened??
Well, I was about 10 and my brother and I made an awesome fort in the midst of my mother's large evergreen trees. In order to make this awesome fort though, we had to create a doorway (Now, just to fill you in... I was already extremely domesticated at 10, so this fort was really more of a home. We made steps to enter and found a rug and table to put in the middle. I actually got a broom and swept all the debris out of our 'area!' ) Well, to create a nice doorway, I got out the tree trimmers and started cutting away, I wanted a nice large arching entrance. My mother wasn't too excited about this LARGE 'entrance' I'd made to our little fort... so then comes the discipline. You see, she was all on board for the imagination, making a fort, and even furnishing it, but when it came to cutting out huge parts of her evergreen trees... and without permission especially, that's where she had to draw the line. And that's when I heard the famous parental quotes... "This hurts me more than it hurts you." I thought, "Um, ok, how could it, I'm the one getting the sore butt!" (of course, I never, ever said that)
Now, 15 years later (almost), I'm a parent. And maybe, just maybe, my mother understood a little bit more than I thought she did. ;-) Love ya mom!
I do have to say, we just went to dinner with some friends last night that we haven't seen in a really long time, and we had Baby Blue with us. Dinner began at what was her normal bedtime and I was a little bit scared... but she was wonderful. She was polite, sat in her chair, ate well, was happy, didn't whine... what a night! I love that! That wonderful night out didn't start there though, we've been disciplining Baby Blue since she could sit up. I know that may sound harsh, but of course discipline is always custom fit to her age and understanding. I think too often we underestimate or don't give our children credit for how smart they really are. Just because they may not be able to articulate everything they'd like to, it doesn't mean they can't understand it. I came across this awesome article on discipline and want to share it with you. The word 'discipline' sometimes can give off a negative connotation, but this article really explains what we as parents should do... and gives it a good light. Applying good, loving and proper discipline will definitely result in more dinners out with a wonderful little angel beside you!!
Don't forget to read this article!
The "Forgotten" Part of Discipline













as someone who was "underdisciplined" and taught to take very little personal responsibility for their actions, i can tell you it hurts you more in the grand scheme of things than you could imagine. it's taken me a lifetime to learn accountability and i strive to teach it to asher now.
ReplyDeletei love dealing with his tantrums in public (which if you know him personally have nothing to do with his autism and everything to do with power struggles). i often carry a wooden spoon in my purse (if it's big enough, lol) and pull it out from time to time. the thing is, i've never used it on him. i used one at church ONE time and since then i only need mention the word "spoon" or show it to him and voila, he's in check. my theory...use this kind of discipline once, under the right circumstances, and you may never have to use it again, lol!
but as for the "public," you should see the faces on people, especially secular people, when i take out the spoon...priceless!
my dad was all about the spoon...he actually gave us a choice when we got old enough to understand:
ReplyDelete1. the hand of knowledge
2. the belt of education
3. or the spoon of accountability
i was the good child, so it only took a couple times to get me in check but my brother got the choices every other day :)
haha
Awww.. sorry Tab...
ReplyDeleteyour right, I always .. didn't like that part. But, it really wasn't necessary with you too often. Most of the time we just needed to talk.
I am so proud of who you have become!
I love you -
Mom