Living Color

I would love to write something terribly over the top and poetic, but operating on little sleep lends itself to my right brain firing at half mast. We've been sleeping with an achy, feverish little babe tucked between us while I hover and hush most of the night. But this morning, just as the sun began to do it's morning routine of peaking out through the top of our dark bedroom curtains to slowly wake us, my little one's eyes opened and locked with mine... and there it was. That huge grin with six little teeth showing through. That huge grin assuring mama that all is right.  That huge grin telling us that the fever broke and sunshine and giggles are on their way to being the norm again.

And in this state of half sleepy, half elated mind, I write, stream of consciousness style.

All of a sudden, I'm typing through water-logged eyes and tears begin to form droplets on my cheeks. As I think back to what this year was, what it made me, I'm reminded how blessed we are. To be able to embrace change and heartache, knowing that the bumps in the road are what make the good times that much sweeter. To love with no fear of abandon, and letting my soul intertwine so deeply with two little ones that are still teaching me what it is to be a mommy.

The older I get, the more I realize I'm capable of, and that dreams don't have to stay dreams forever. I love that the new year is a great big blank canvas, and I've got a bucket load of colors, ready to throw all the paint at it that I can. Sometimes it will be the purposeful, beautiful lines of a smooth brush, and other times it will be a splash tossed whimsically and haphazardly, but it will always, always be full of color. I'm ready for a colorful year. I'm ready to paint my canvas like there's no tomorrow. I'm ready to dream big. I'm ready to dream afraid, because I know in doing so, I'll be taking risks that would otherwise leave me stagnant. My heart is ready to stretch even further. More learning, more growing, more love.

This year brought us so much and taught me what it was too see in vivid color... and for every moment, I'm grateful.


The completion of the Maternity Series...


and the birth of our Brayden. February.



Sunsets at our favorite beach, June and August.



Checking off our Summer list, and enjoying our crazy beautiful... naked life.




Weekends out and weekends at home, August.




This little one began the great chapter of her fourth year. September.




Family vacation to the sunny beaches and salty air of Florida, October.


Being thankful during a long month of travel... and being home.

Oh, it was most definitely a good year, and I know there's so much more to come. Cheers to the New Year, hoping yours is fabulously painted in living color.

Let's celebrate. Celebrate well.

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One For The Files

The last couple of days, and particularly nights, can be crossed of the list, check marked and filed in that big oversize file entitled Moments That Smug Parents Tell You To "Wait" For. You know the ones. You're waxing on about the sweet little toothless grin of your newborn and hear a quippy Just wait until he's teething, along with a look of We'll just see if your happy to be a mom then.

Well, round two on this babyin' thing, and I wouldn't choose to be anywhere else than here, marked by a nice dose of snot and spit up, weary from holding a listless baby... And happy.
Happy that my arms can serve as a calming salve that comforts my little one.



Brayden's been sporting his first fever starting a couple of days ago. We arrived home from a day date and as soon as I scooped up his lethargic body in my arms and pressed my lips in for a kiss on his forehead, I knew this would be a moment. One that get's filed away in my memory banks, alongside the First Laugh and First Crawl... here it is. First Fever.

We took him in to the doctor just to be on the safe side, and our little champ's teething along with a possible slight virus.

Nights have been spent rocking, Tylenol-ing, whispering many "It's okays," patting with a chilled washcloth and hushing back to sleep. And because bouts of sleep don't last long, for either of us, I lay him back in bed next to me, with my hand feeling the heat of his back, hovering and waiting for the cool to come.



Yesterday, we had a family adventure all planned out... and paid for with no chance of refund. So, since we're high on living life, we charged ahead to the indoor hotel waterpark to escape the cold. Our little cling-on stayed conformed to the shape of my chest the entire time, his heavy body pressed against mine and flushed face resting in the nook of my neck and shoulders. I floated my way through the kiddie pool to help keep him cool, figured out a way rock him in the rickety white plastic chair while stabilizing my phone to photograph my girl traipsing through the pools with her daddy, and awkwardly balanced my sleepy babe in my arms as I pushed a full stroller back to our room for a nap.

We're all a little tired and out of it, finding the harmony of this interim week where work and vacation are trying to counterbalance one another and enjoying the soon-to-be-getting-back-to-normal.

Enjoy your weekend filled with your own lasts of this year and firsts of the next!



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Beauty of the In-Between

My mind has been swimming deep in holiday vacation mode. I sit down to write and find myself hitting the backspace key almost more than pecking away at the letters while trying to form a cohesive thought. Even now, I'm enroute on an impromptu day-date with my man as we encountered an unexpected day off and already had our amazing sitter lined up to entertain the littles with thier small heap of Christmas toys in the middle of the living room floor for a couple of hours. Lunch date and Walmart run, here we come.

Our hearts are still wrapped around the magic of the season while we're floating in true R&R fashion and enjoying the beautiful in-between moments. Between the Fa La La La La's and the kiss of the new year, there's a certain pleasure in the art of nothing. And we're wading through the sweet lull before the next high.

We're being seated and our bellies are rumbling, a late lunch is a callin.' Cheers to enjoying the in-betweens!

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Sunday Citar ~ Christmas

It was perfect.

And now it's Sunday again and that means it's time for two of my favorite things... announcing a giveaway winner and Sunday Citar!! 

First, let's share a quote or two... a favorite, a new find, a laugh inducing or tear inducing quote you love this week! Welcome to Sunday Citar!



"Christmas - that magic blanket that wraps itself about us, that something so intangible that it is like a fragrance. It may weave a spell of nostalgia. Christmas may be a day of feasting, or of prayer, but always it will be a day of remembrance - -a day in which we think of everything we have ever loved."
~Augusta E. Rundel

The house is comfortably disheveled and has settled into a quiet lull, save the background noise coming from the TV of this year's marathon series Chris and I have been watching and a fire snapping and cracking behind us while a countertop of snacks and treats entices us from the kitchen.

Today we created memories and I'm soaking it all in.

Beginning the day with a girl completely aware and excited about every moment that was unfolding around her, whispering through a smile in the dark of our cozy room that it was time to open presents.  Yet, before even looking at her gifts, nothing excited her more than handing me a present handpicked by her... from the gift itself to the wedding inspired wrapping paper of which I have to agree with her words, "It was so pretty."



The morning continued with wrapping paper strewn about the floor after merry giving and receiving, and a breakfast made with the help of my sweet little elves... And progressed into a day of cuddling and movie watching, building fires and playing board games, tea parties and snacks and an afternoon trip to the movie theater.

And here is where my words fail me because they'd just cheapen the magic that was floating about.



And yes, she went through about five outfit changes today.











And then tonight, oh tonight, somebody just pinch me.

I laughed through tears as I sidled my girl next to me and we talked about our favorite parts of the day. After rattling off her list she concluded with a cheery and my other favorite is you scratching my back right now.  And so I did, after she added it to her list of favorites, how could I not oblige... and laugh that contagious laugh where we both end up with sore cheeks?

When I just couldn't laugh anymore, I hugged her tighter and breathed it all in. I whispered in the dark of her room that my favorites were all the right now moments with her, and how much I loved cuddling her and I new someday I would look back and wish I could be right here, right now in this moment. She looked back at me with those big hazel eyes and in her profound, four year old wisdom said, "What?"

Memories, baby.



Our Christmas card this year.

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I would love to have you join the Sunday Citar inspiration and have all of us come to your blog to read what quotes inspire you! Simply write your own post on your blog, link within your post to my blog, and sign up with Mr. Linky below, leaving your name and the link directly to your Sunday Citar post. Just click here if any of that sounds confusing. There you'll be able to get the complete rundown, as well as learn how to link back to my blog if you don't already know how. Take a moment a visit a few participants... you'll be glad you did!

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And now for the winner of the free 3 month membership to Jumpstart...

Commenter #3, Ashlee: "You know, I always feel like I'm not teaching Jude enough. I have even thought about maybe putting him in Preschool next year. I have been praying hard about it. I am still undecided. But until I do decide, I love online learning websites. We play "Games" (As Jude calls them) every day. He can count to 5, and knows a few letters. It's a start."

Merry Christmas... and contact freshmommy@me.com to claim your prize!

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Feelin' It

Last night I felt it. The glow from the lights hung along the line of the roof whispered the softest glimmer along the outline of my babe's face as his slow rhythmn of suck-suck-breathe lulled us both into a sleepy trance. The white cushy chair rocked us both in the corner of his room... the perfect oasis from the active day that wore us into a pair of rag dolls. And not but a few feet away with a shallow wall between us, was the heartbeat of my girl, curled up in her bed, her eyes ready to give way to the back of her lids after hearing the fourth chapter of The Friendly Snowflake (a book passed down from my grandparents, one of them still living) read aloud by her daddy.

And there it was. This thrill of mamahood thing. This loving having babies thing. This charge from being high on Christmas. This knowing that even if I miss it and say the wrong thing at the wrong time, or lose it for a second, we're a family, a team... and we all come together within our four walls, and together, this meshing of it all is what makes us "us." But it's even more than that, and I'm not sure that my words can actually hit the mark on the feelings that surge through every nerve and cell of my body when it comes to my kids. This season always sparks something in me, it adds flame to the fire that's already burning bright.

At one point I thought that quite possibly the busyness and hustle lately might take away from the fireworks of the season, my favorite season, you know, until the next one comes along. But no, I think it's shaping up to be a great Holiday season... we're making it that way. Molding our plans and traditions. Creating memories.  Spinning our brains to make the most of every second our family has and makin' it good.

Like evening marathon bake-offs with my little fairy. Yes, she adds a little magic as she rolls out the dough with her own special rolling pin.





And mad-dashing it to the store after we re-nigged on our agreement that the adult presents in the house would solely be remodeling our bathroom come the new year, to preserve the tradition of everyone opening and donning a new set of pj's on Christmas Eve. 'Cause that's a tradition that can't be broken. Mama says.

The next couple of days will be spent huddling around the food table, sharing stories and laughing with aunts and cousins. Playing games and exchanging anecdotes with uncles and grandparents. And then Christmas... it's just us. It has a nice ring to it, doesn't it? Just us.




The countdown is nearing it's end.

And I'm feelin' it.  Feelin' pretty fa la la la la as we breathe in the rich aromas, being serenaded  by Zooey Deschanel rockin' out Baby It's Cold Outside and sopping up all the delicious festive flavors.



And to all of you who come and grace this space with your time and comments, I'm perpetually blessed and enriched by you.

Merry Christmas.

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They Have a Different View of Christmas

Visit Wordless Wednesday, Supermom and 5 Minutes for Mom for more Wordless Wednesday.

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Ten Months

I think back to this time last year and how the beauty of the season unfolded magnificently and yet paled in comparison to the splendid round belly I would rub with dreams of what it would soon bring. With every snow flake that fluttered it's way down to our street lined with Griswold style lit up houses, I'd feel a glimmer of excitement steal through my body... for Christmas yes, but even more so for the life growing inside me and the change that was sure to come.

This week has had me in a snowball of emotions. It could be the season, the weather, the busyness, the way he is growing... but mostly, I think it has something to do with the hormones.  My system is changing again, and I'm learning to settle into this contented rhythm of so-be-it.

And baby, I have to say, this second time around is different. I'm just remembering the thrill of imagining him, and cherishing how he's surpassed every expectation I had. I want to experience every wave, every snowball of emotion, every storm and every calm on purpose. So the rest of this week I'm steeping deep in the calm of my family with a little extra time off coming soon and some fireside tree gazing and hot cocoa sipping ready to charm us. The thrill of the season still has me wrapped around it's finger this year, 'cause this week is Baby's First Christmas.

And I think he might have a present up his sleeve, 'cause baby's been trying to walk.

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Sunday Citar ~ Friendship

Welcome to Sunday Citar!  A place where we can all share a piece of inspiration through quotes.  Get ready to link up.  Here we go!



"Maybe I can't stop the downpour, but I will always, always join you for a walk in the rain."
~Unknown

Sometimes in life you come across a friend who changes your life just by walking through it... and becoming a part of it. Someone that challenges you to grow and stretch yourself because they believe in you. Someone that laughs just as loud as you do, and isn't ashamed to trip down the street with you because you're laughing so hard that you cry. Someone that says the right thing at the right time. Someone that calls to say they have an idea and they're on their way over the night before your girl's big party.

And though we might not share the same current path in life, like planning trips to France versus planning family vacations to Disney... our passions and our goals make us more alike than different.

And though I tend to think my friends are better friends than I at times, remembering to call when I don't, coming up with thoughtful gifts when I go the giftcard route... one thing is certain. It doesn't matter if it's a downpour of unicorns and lollcipops or a drencher of hail and tears, I'll always, always join them for a walk in the rain. And that makes us more alike than different.




Oh, and another little love that I would do anything for. Anything. A little one that I love. Love a lot.



My little love and her cousins.

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I would love to have you join the Sunday Citar inspiration and have all of us come to your blog to read what quotes inspire you! Simply write your own post on your blog, link within your post to my blog, and sign up with Mr. Linky below, leaving your name and the link directly to your Sunday Citar post. Just click here if any of that sounds confusing. There you'll be able to get the complete rundown, as well as learn how to link back to my blog if you don't already know how. Take a moment a visit a few participants... you'll be glad you did!

10 comments