I drove away from her school Monday with my heart in my throat, it's pounding left me breathless as I held back tears. Who knew that mama love would hurt. My heart hurts loving her.
After talking ourselves in circles about this schooling decision, and only making our final decision very recently, I'm happy with where we're at. We've danced around the option of homeschooling, tip toed around different school choices, taken tours, made lists of pros and cons for each and had finally settled on a choice we're all happy with... And just in time for Aliyah to get excited about it! It seems like up until now, decisions for our kids have been fairly easy, with this one big thing looming over our heads. It felt like we had so much time and we talked to so many that offered great advice, that finally, we fell into what we thought would be the best fit for us, for our family, for our little social butterfly.
And the thing is? If we need to change it later we will.
Kindergarten is like taking a pin to that sweet little bubble that's kept our home a nice and comfy cocoon. It's been warm and beautiful, it's been comfortable. And now? She ventures out of that cocoon five days a week, away from my arms and my side and into the influence of others, and hopefully she'll be the influencer for good in the midst of what everyone else is doing and saying. As a mother, every morning leaves me wondering if I've done enough, said enough, hugged enough... and then has me stepping back, cheering from the sidelines and learning new ways to be there for her. My evening hugs will be longer and sweeter, our conversations more intentional, I'll be packing some amazing lunches and choosing outfits we both love. This whole Kindergarten thing is a learning curve for me as well, learning to let go and yet still always there, and she'll know.
She's just starting a new chapter to her own story. One she will write with my attention and applause.
“Life is uncharted territory. It reveals its story one moment at a time.” Leo F. Buscaglia
Okay, so this school outfit thing? It is definitely a do-it-together process with my independent girl. She knows what she likes... and mostly, that's comfort. Her closet is stocked with a row of dresses front and center that are her favorites, her most comfortable and twirly little pieces. But the collaboration process has been fun. She likes her hair down, I like it up. She likes dresses, I like leggings. She likes tennis, I like flats... and we work together. A bit of give and take from us both. We're learning. We're growing, together.
Amazing lunches include some of our reusable favorites, like the
WasteNotSak to hold little treats, snacks, napkins and notes, the
Orbit band engraved with her name that stays on her water bottle so it doesn't get mixed up... and sandwiches cut into shapes with a cookie cutter (and little notes you can download
here) all put together in this stackable
Rubbermaid LunchBlox set. One of my favorite things to do is add a couple of frozen strawberries to her water bottle in the morning... not only does it work like ice in keeping her drink cool, it adds subtle flavor and she always drink down her water for the day so she can unscrew the lid and eat the strawberries that have thawed by the end of the day.
There arose a cheer when she picked
this totally adorable owl backpack over cartoon characters.
Quintessential girlhood fingers... chipped polish the day after being painted.
It's been an adventurous first week, full of smiles and tears. And I know the adventures are just starting. Write that story, my little butterfly. Write that beautiful, colorful story with your best, most favorite Crayola colors.
xo
For more on heading back to school, check out our
First Day of School Breakfast and
The Teacher Gift!
